Communication

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Words. Sometimes they come so easy, like when we're passionate about something, or when we're mad about something. Then other times, words are harder to put together. Like when your friend is telling you something, and you want to respond the right way. Or when you're trying to convey an idea, or talk about an abstract concept. Or when you're trying to explain your own thoughts and feelings about things.

My best friend has recently helped me come to realize that I have a hard time materializing my thoughts and opinions. She's been amazingly in-tune with my responses to things she talks about, probably even more so than I have been. I hadn't really thought about the fact that I tend to withdraw from discussions about controversial topics. I think there are many parts and reasons to why this is. Part of it is conditioning, I'm around people who loudly express their opinions, with little room for discussion. Part of it is I don't want to hurt the people I'm talking to, or make them think that I think they're stupid. Part of it is my aversion to conflict. Part of it is a fear of being rejected or being thought of as stupid. Part of it is my difficulty in putting my thoughts into words, and knowing what I believe.

I've also come to realize that communicating is an important way I can start to materialize those thoughts. I don't think about everything all the time, so when someone brings it up, talking about it can help me to form my own opinions, or to realize what they are.

Something I've found inhibits coherent communication is sleep and general well-being. I have had poor sleep or not enough sleep lately, and that has impacted my ability to put together words and convey thoughts to others.

It might also be that my lack of experience communicating my personal thoughts and opinions has come back to bite me. I don't have much practice disagreeing with someone and not having the discussion become curt, hurtful, loud, or one-sided.

I'm extremely thankful for my friend who is helping me, and being patient with me, as I figure out how to communicate without circumventing the point. Or without turning the discussion into something hurtful. Hopefully, the more I communicate about the more difficult topics, the more I'll be able to speak confidently, and kindly. Hopefully, I'll also start to know my own opinions and be able to communicate them to other people.



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